Halloween is just around the corner. It is a time for frightful ghouls and cute pumpkins. Have you got your costumes picked out? Have you got a stash of sweets ready for the trick or treaters? Parenting in itself can be terrifying, so I have decided to put a spin on the scary Halloween theme, which may not come out as fun as intended, as I discuss what the scariest parts of parenting is.
We all find different things scary, some of us cower upstairs and rock slowly back and forth if confronted with a mammoth spider in the downstairs hallway, others would remove the beast calmly. Some have a fear of strange items- I hate cotton wool! So as each parent and child is different, so are the things we fear with parenting. That is why I have been getting in touch with some of the Mums I know, to find out just what we believe are the scariest parts of parenting. Here are 8 of the scariest aspects of parenting.
1. For some, the mere cost of children is the scariest part. I don't think you can ever really budget for children, or save up for them. You will never have enough money. I love spending money on the kids, from nice new pjs to a new bedtime story. I find myself out shopping, rarely getting anything for myself but always finding things for my boys. However, they are pretty simple at the end of the day, my boy's favourite things to play with are sticks from our walks outside! One huge thing I am coming to terms with though is the price of schooling- I am starting to add up all the little extras now; from uniform to school trips and discos- it all leaves a hole in the pocket.
2. One of the most common answers I found was the feeling of not being good enough for your child. I can definitely feel this from time to time; its an overwhelming feeling which gets you lost. Mums end up comparing themselves to others; wondering if they should be stricter, if their children eat healthily enough, the list goes on. It is so scary being in charge of mini humans you made, hoping that you lead them down the right path in life but as every parent is different, so is every child and I believe that you know your child better than anyone- we need to trust our gut instincts that bit more. We need to stop worrying about whether we are a good enough Mum, because worrying about it just proves that you already are.
3. Pregnancy in itself can be a scary time, from the fear of miscarriage to the fear of pain in labour. Another scary issue is the worry of not getting sleep once baby is here. One resounding thing about parenthood that you hear everywhere is that parents don't sleep and that babies have you up at all hours of the night. To be heavily pregnant with the thought of a future of no sleep ahead is pretty daunting. Although babies aren't the best sleepers and for the next 10 or so years your sleep will be completely disturbed, it's strangely not all that bad, you get used to it and end up being thrown into parenthood and just owning it and feeling at ease with what it brings.
4. Practical fears were also a common answer; as a parent you can warn your children and teach them all about safety, but sometimes it doesn't always go in and accidents can happen. The practical fears can roam from being scared that your child could fall into some water, hurt themselves climbing and messing around or running into the road when you are close to it. There so many things parents have to teach their children; water safety, road safety, stranger danger or being careful using scissors or knives. It is even harder when they are young and don't have a fear of anything. We are constantly guiding them from a young age; "Don't put your fingers in the plug", "Don't touch the oven when it's on", "Do not run off", "Don't play on the stairs" Children are very accident prone too so it's no wonder that fears of accidents happening are such a scary part of parenting. For me, personally, I think these are the scariest parts, especially when they go to school and you have no control over what they are up to. I am dreading Zac's first school trip for this very reason.
5. Some Mums fear failing their child, or their child growing up to be disappointed in them as a parent. We fear not teaching them enough or doing something against what the child really wants. I think any Mum that worries about failing their child should realise how amazing it is to even find that scary. The ones that worry about things like this should know how it makes them the best parent as I'm sure the fear will prevent them from ever failing their child. It is definitely scary to know that the choices we make as a parent will shape our children and how they turn out to be when they are older. We want them to turn out to be the best possible people, and it is up to us to start shaping that from a young age.
6. There are plenty of parenting debates that are spoken about all over social media that are stressful and frightful; a couple that are brought to mind are breastfeeding or formula feeding or whether you should go out to work or be a stay at home Mum. These are two things that everyone is torn about, you worry and fear that you aren't making the right choice. It is so important to realise that everyone is different, everyone will parent differently and you have to do what is right for yourself and for your family.
7. Another scary part to parenting is how quickly time goes. It flies by, they grow up faster than you can imagine. I, for one, can not believe that my little man is now a school boy. It doesn't seem possible; the years have literally flown by and I find this both scary and sad.
8. We often fear that we can not fulfil the needs that our children require, that we can not help them as much as we want to because we are not physically able to. This is particularly true when it comes to children with special needs. No matter how much you want to help them, to take away their frustration or pain, to help them to grow, there is nothing more you can do than what you are already doing and that can be a very frightening aspect.
For me the scariest part is definitely about their safety, I know I will love them and care for them more than anything else in my life and I shall try my hardest to bring them up with so many brilliant aspects to their characters, like being caring, non-judgemental, kind and supporting their education. I will always compare, I will always wonder if what I am doing is right but I have to trust my mothering gut instinct. The fear of safety is deeper than all of that- it's about not having control over them every moment of their life to ensure their safety, as we know accidents can easily happen or illnesses and we have no control then. That is scary. I can't even bear to think about consequences of things like this because it just is too frightening. All I cause always strive to do my best for my children.
Each day in parenting can bring new scary prospects or experiences. Most of us parents still have the hormonal teenage stage to get through too! Just imagine.
What is the scariest part of parenting for you? What are your fears when it comes to raising your children? Leave a comment below, or on my Facebook page- I always love hearing from you. If you liked this blog and want to read more from us, then please do subscribe; all of the links that you need are below.
For more daily doses of parenting highs and lows, follow me on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.
We all find different things scary, some of us cower upstairs and rock slowly back and forth if confronted with a mammoth spider in the downstairs hallway, others would remove the beast calmly. Some have a fear of strange items- I hate cotton wool! So as each parent and child is different, so are the things we fear with parenting. That is why I have been getting in touch with some of the Mums I know, to find out just what we believe are the scariest parts of parenting. Here are 8 of the scariest aspects of parenting.
1. For some, the mere cost of children is the scariest part. I don't think you can ever really budget for children, or save up for them. You will never have enough money. I love spending money on the kids, from nice new pjs to a new bedtime story. I find myself out shopping, rarely getting anything for myself but always finding things for my boys. However, they are pretty simple at the end of the day, my boy's favourite things to play with are sticks from our walks outside! One huge thing I am coming to terms with though is the price of schooling- I am starting to add up all the little extras now; from uniform to school trips and discos- it all leaves a hole in the pocket. 2. One of the most common answers I found was the feeling of not being good enough for your child. I can definitely feel this from time to time; its an overwhelming feeling which gets you lost. Mums end up comparing themselves to others; wondering if they should be stricter, if their children eat healthily enough, the list goes on. It is so scary being in charge of mini humans you made, hoping that you lead them down the right path in life but as every parent is different, so is every child and I believe that you know your child better than anyone- we need to trust our gut instincts that bit more. We need to stop worrying about whether we are a good enough Mum, because worrying about it just proves that you already are.
3. Pregnancy in itself can be a scary time, from the fear of miscarriage to the fear of pain in labour. Another scary issue is the worry of not getting sleep once baby is here. One resounding thing about parenthood that you hear everywhere is that parents don't sleep and that babies have you up at all hours of the night. To be heavily pregnant with the thought of a future of no sleep ahead is pretty daunting. Although babies aren't the best sleepers and for the next 10 or so years your sleep will be completely disturbed, it's strangely not all that bad, you get used to it and end up being thrown into parenthood and just owning it and feeling at ease with what it brings.
4. Practical fears were also a common answer; as a parent you can warn your children and teach them all about safety, but sometimes it doesn't always go in and accidents can happen. The practical fears can roam from being scared that your child could fall into some water, hurt themselves climbing and messing around or running into the road when you are close to it. There so many things parents have to teach their children; water safety, road safety, stranger danger or being careful using scissors or knives. It is even harder when they are young and don't have a fear of anything. We are constantly guiding them from a young age; "Don't put your fingers in the plug", "Don't touch the oven when it's on", "Do not run off", "Don't play on the stairs" Children are very accident prone too so it's no wonder that fears of accidents happening are such a scary part of parenting. For me, personally, I think these are the scariest parts, especially when they go to school and you have no control over what they are up to. I am dreading Zac's first school trip for this very reason.
5. Some Mums fear failing their child, or their child growing up to be disappointed in them as a parent. We fear not teaching them enough or doing something against what the child really wants. I think any Mum that worries about failing their child should realise how amazing it is to even find that scary. The ones that worry about things like this should know how it makes them the best parent as I'm sure the fear will prevent them from ever failing their child. It is definitely scary to know that the choices we make as a parent will shape our children and how they turn out to be when they are older. We want them to turn out to be the best possible people, and it is up to us to start shaping that from a young age.
6. There are plenty of parenting debates that are spoken about all over social media that are stressful and frightful; a couple that are brought to mind are breastfeeding or formula feeding or whether you should go out to work or be a stay at home Mum. These are two things that everyone is torn about, you worry and fear that you aren't making the right choice. It is so important to realise that everyone is different, everyone will parent differently and you have to do what is right for yourself and for your family. 7. Another scary part to parenting is how quickly time goes. It flies by, they grow up faster than you can imagine. I, for one, can not believe that my little man is now a school boy. It doesn't seem possible; the years have literally flown by and I find this both scary and sad.
8. We often fear that we can not fulfil the needs that our children require, that we can not help them as much as we want to because we are not physically able to. This is particularly true when it comes to children with special needs. No matter how much you want to help them, to take away their frustration or pain, to help them to grow, there is nothing more you can do than what you are already doing and that can be a very frightening aspect.
For me the scariest part is definitely about their safety, I know I will love them and care for them more than anything else in my life and I shall try my hardest to bring them up with so many brilliant aspects to their characters, like being caring, non-judgemental, kind and supporting their education. I will always compare, I will always wonder if what I am doing is right but I have to trust my mothering gut instinct. The fear of safety is deeper than all of that- it's about not having control over them every moment of their life to ensure their safety, as we know accidents can easily happen or illnesses and we have no control then. That is scary. I can't even bear to think about consequences of things like this because it just is too frightening. All I cause always strive to do my best for my children.
Each day in parenting can bring new scary prospects or experiences. Most of us parents still have the hormonal teenage stage to get through too! Just imagine.
What is the scariest part of parenting for you? What are your fears when it comes to raising your children? Leave a comment below, or on my Facebook page- I always love hearing from you. If you liked this blog and want to read more from us, then please do subscribe; all of the links that you need are below.
For more daily doses of parenting highs and lows, follow me on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.
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